This is it! This is the day I start it. This is my first fucking entry! Holy shit! I’ve never written a blog before so bear with me if this is painful for the first little while. I’m going to try this and see how it goes. I’m a sex addict. I wish I could […]Read more "An introduction…"
https://itun.es/us/BpWhdb?i=1126106783 https://g.co/kgs/1tKzKs Tonight I was sitting at a bar waiting for some food at an event. Beach volleyball championships were on tv, on NBC. At commercial breaks, NBC would show adds for the upcoming 2018 Olympic Winter Games with highlights of hockey, skiing and snowboarding. MY three best sports that I have ever been good […]Read more "All the things that I have lost"
So I’ve started reading a book called Silently Seduced: When Parents Make Their Children Partners Paperback by Kenneth Adams Ph.D. . I’m reading it because a therapist has recommended it and my wife is pretty big on the idea that my family is the root of all my problems. I’m not denying that she’s right, […]Read more "Family Crap"
I feel anxious and overwhelmed. I feel a bit angry and powerless. I feel that my struggles with MyWife are futile and hopeless. I feel like things are never going to get better. I feel ashamed. I’m going to send my family disclosure to my cousins and I’m scared to do that. I don’t know […]Read more "Today"
It’s been a while since I journaled or posted anything to my blog. I haven’t felt like it. I’ve avoided it. It’s now time to get back into it and resume that self care. Yesterday I drove down to City for a couple of job interviews. I wasn’t really interested in either of the jobs. Mostly […]Read more "It’s been a while…"
I recently started reading Abba’s Child by Brennan Manning. It was recommended to me by the pastor of a church I’ve been attending recently. I don’t know why, but I find this kind of stuff so hard to read. I can read a good fiction book like something by James Rollins or Steve Berry in as […]Read more "Hello God"
I guess what I can say about it is that it wasn’t as bad as I thought. It was painful and shameful. Terrifying and nerve wracking but my wife didn’t get up and run out of there screaming. She did’t look at me with disgust. She didn’t even get angry. I am scared that she […]Read more "I Did My Disclosure Today…"
I listen to a lot of podcasts. I thought this was good excerpt from the May 19th edition of This American Life. I don’t know why I though it was so good, other than it spoke about someone in a very similar situation to me. Here is the audio from Act 2: Act II – […]Read more "Fermi’s Paradox"
I thought this was supposed to be getting easier. It’s not. I had though that knowing more about all of this would help. It hasn’t. I thought I would be doing better, but I’m not. Addiction, or at least sex addiction is lonely. The opposite of addiction is supposed to be connection. Why is connection […]Read more "I need to brush my teeth…"
Originally posted on The Secrets of Addiction:
I’m struggling to narrow down all of my thoughts into a single topic. I’ve been to five meetings in seven days. The learning curve in the first parts of recovery is pretty steep. There is a lot of information available, once you can finally admit to yourself that…
So I’m back in CityX for two days. I came down for a job interview today and I also had to arrange some community service hours with the court and I have to meet with my probation officer tomorrow. (In case you haven’t been following, I was arrested for soliciting prostitution, which is how I […]Read more "Back in CityX… Old Temptations Arise"